Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Nonfiction Inspection: How To Be Famous by Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt

Title: How To Be Famous

Subtitle: Our Guide to -Looking the Part -Playing the Press and -Becoming a Tabloid Fixture
Authors: Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt
Topic: Fame
Chapter Titles: Your Point of Entry, Spencer's Guide to Playing the Villain, Heidi's Guide to Playing the Bombshell, Pretty on the Outside!, The Paps are Your Friends, Tell Your Story, Couple Power!, Building Your Brand, Getting Word Done Is Your Job, By Heidi, Famously Ever After, Epilogue, In Case of Emergency
Format: Hardcover

Precis: How to be Famous is a guide to the formula used by Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag on how they got famous for... well... being famous. Their formula seems to mostly consist of walking a well-balanced line where you don't cross into taboodom, but you get as much overexposure and drama involving yourselves as possible. They talk about the Jennifer Garner method of trading up your partner. The Angelina Jolie method of getting the one you want. The beneficial parts of being a (please excuse my language) bitch and villain and backstabbing your way to the top are also mentioned. They talk about how the sum of two parts is greater than the whole and back it up with the formula Speidi > Spencer + Heidi. I mean, these guys should know, right? Because they are reality TV stars who made themselves one of the most photographed and talked about couples in Hollywood, so who better to teach you how to become famous than the people who became famous while not using any talents or accomplishing anything extraordinary. And just think, all this for less than the price of 5 US Weeklies.

Verdict: I Heart It. Read this like a guide to get famous, and you'll be sorely disappointed. Read this like the humor that its intended to be, and you'll laugh. I guess that if you really wanted to be famous (but by reading this it only reiterated to me that I do not, in fact) there are some tips that you could pick up along the way. There are about ten gazillion pictures in this little book, so the reading isn't heavy at all. It's just a matter of determining how much Speidi you can look at in one sitting that will determine when you will put it down. This would make a great gift for that social climber you know or that wannabe Hollywood starlet next door. Just sayin' since Christmas is around the corner.

Acquire It:

Changing Hands
Book Depository

Special Addendum:
I watched the first 5 episodes of the first season of the Hills as required by my pesky challenge set forth by Ella. This includes the episode in which Heidi crashes Lauren's Teen Vogue party and makes a really bad scene. You know, it wasn't total torture watching these, but I haven't gone back to finish Season 1 or even really thought about it unless I hear or read a story on the characters online. I'm glad that Ella made me watch a little, because now I at least have a pop culture reference to go to, but folks, this isn't quality television. Lauren (who Heidi refers to as the "good girl" in the book above, but strangely doesn't use names) is pretty annoying if you ask me. It's as if she thinks she's above interndom, but she's totally not. Heidi I found to be completely agonizing. I mean, landing an assistant job at an event planning firm is not easy to do. She doesn't realize how lucky she was there. But I guess if you have aspirations to become famous just for being famous, you don't really get the whole 9-5 thing, or the whole being proud of your work thing either. She kinda hit that point home in the book too. Now that she's famous, it's only about staying famous. So I guess in conclusion, The Hills is fine for reality TV, but a) I doubt that it was even reality TV, and have my strong suspicions that it's a semi-scripted show with everything lined up for the actors and actresses, and b) I don't really do reality TV 'cause most of it is totally lame (the exception being Project Runway of course) and this was no exception.

Challenge Status: 2 completed of the required 5. Check out my letter to Nick Cage on Ella's site (I guest blogged it for her).

I am grateful for celebrity gossip blogs. They always uplift me and make me feel happy that I am who I am and not what others think I should be.

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